Wine Not? A Christian Girl’s Guide to Drinking, Partying, and Staying True to Your Values
Let’s be real—drinking is everywhere. It’s not just at parties or nights out; it’s in the group chats, the bottomless brunch invites, the “let’s grab a drink” first dates, and the after-work happy hours. It’s woven into our culture so deeply that not drinking feels like the weird choice.
But what if you’re at a place in your faith where drinking just doesn’t feel right anymore? Maybe you’re tired of the regret, the peer pressure, or the way alcohol makes you feel spiritually disconnected. Or maybe you just don’t want to rely on it for fun anymore.
And yet… stopping feels hard. What if you lose friends? What if people think you’re being judgmental? What if you’re not fun without it?
If you’ve wrestled with these thoughts, you’re not alone. The pressure to drink is real—but you don’t have to let it define you.
1. The Pressure to Drink is Everywhere
It’s not just about wanting to drink. It’s about feeling like you have to. Because saying “I’m good” when someone hands you a drink suddenly turns into a conversation.
“Come on, just one!”
“You used to be fun.”
“Wait… is this a Jesus thing?”
And if you say no, it can feel like you’re being the buzzkill. The girl who’s “too serious.” The one who’s making everyone else uncomfortable.
But listen—you don’t owe anyone an explanation. You don’t have to justify your choices to make other people feel better about theirs. A simple “No, thanks” is enough. The people who respect you won’t push, and the people who do? That’s on them, not you.
2. What If I Lose Friends?
This is the part that stings. If drinking has been a big part of your social life, stepping away from it might shift your friendships. And that’s hard.
But ask yourself: Are these real friendships? If your connection is built on taking shots together but falls apart when you set a boundary, was it ever that deep?
Real friends will respect you. And the ones who make you feel guilty? They might just be uncomfortable because your choice makes them question theirs. Stay firm in your values, and trust that the right people will stay.
3. But… Am I Still Fun Without It?
Yes. Yes. Yes. One of the biggest lies culture tells us is that alcohol = fun. But some of the best nights, deepest laughs, and most joy-filled moments come when you’re fully present, without needing a drink to get there.
You don’t need alcohol to be the life of the party. You don’t need it to feel confident, social, or free. You are fully you—and that is more than enough.
And honestly? There’s something magnetic about a woman who doesn’t need a drink to have a good time. It’s rare, it’s refreshing, and it makes people think.
4. What If I Mess Up?
Maybe you’ve made commitments before and then found yourself taking another drink at the bar because it was easier in the moment. Maybe you want to stop, but it’s hard when everyone around you is drinking.
Here’s what I need you to know: grace over guilt. This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about learning, growing, and leaning on God when you feel weak. If you slip up, don’t spiral into shame. Ask yourself why you reached for the drink, pray about it, and keep moving forward.
5. You’re Not Alone
If you feel like drinking is losing its appeal but you’re scared of what that change means, I see you. There are so many Christian women who feel this tension but don’t talk about it because they don’t want to be that girl in the friend group.
Here’s some reminders for you <3 :
You can step away from drinking and still have an incredible social life.
You can make decisions that align with your faith and still be confident and joyful.
You can be the one who inspires others to question why drinking is the default in the first place.
If you’re wondering whether alcohol is still serving you, consider this your permission slip: You don’t have to do what everyone else is doing. You don’t have to drink to fit in. You don’t have to follow a culture that normalizes things that don’t sit right with your spirit.
You are strong, beautiful, and completely whole—whether there’s a drink in your hand or not.
And that’s something worth toasting to.
